FIVE REASONS WHY YOU ARE NOT AS HAPPY AS YOU SHOULD BE

Everybody wants to be happy so we try every method possible to find happiness, and when this happiness is eventually found, we try our best to make sure it stays for as long as it can.

But there are some people who, no matter how hard they try, don’t seem to enjoy life the way they want to.

These sets of people remain unhappy regardless of the pleasant situations around them and sometimes, they tend to infect others around them with unhappiness.

If you’re one of these people who can’t find a reason to be happy even when others around them are, then this post is for you.

Eliminating all external factors, some behavioral and mental factors can cause one to be unhappy.

Some of them are;

YOU’RE A PEOPLE PLEASER

This is one of the biggest causes of unhappiness among individuals; trying to please others.

Let me ask you this question…

If you spend the entirety of your day doing what others want, when will you find time to do what you want?

Do you see where the problem lies?

When you try to please everyone, you go out of your way to see that whatever someone asks you to do is done even if it means abandoning your work, and humans as wonderful as we are, exploit this behavior once we sense it.

When a good number of people notice your people-pleasing traits, they will exploit your goodness and when you have too many tasks on your plate, you won’t be able to finish everything you were asked to do.

As this goes on for a while and you continue defaulting on some people’s errands, your mind will condemn you and you’ll be in guilt for quite some time.

When you’re suffering from guilt, it is hard for you to be happy under any circumstance and if the guilt is left unchecked, it might lead to something more catastrophic.

Related to this point is;

YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO SAY NO

Running errands for every Tom, Dick, and Harry is one thing, not having a stand is another.

When you can’t say no to people in necessary situations, you’ll find it difficult to be happy.

This is because, you will constantly have to compromise your stand to accommodate the other person’s bidding, making yourself a slave to the person.

I don’t think I’ve seen any happy slave before, so if you make yourself a slave to another man just because you can’t say no, consider yourself an unhappy fellow.

Following this is;

WRONG ATTITUDE TO WORK/WRONG MINDSET

If you’re a person that seeks instant gratification in any venture you enter into, or you’re the kind of person that doesn’t enjoy the work he is doing, you can’t be happy.

This is because when success seems far, you’ll tire out and the work you’re doing will become very laborious, leading to frustration and eventually unhappiness.

Also, if you are afraid to fail or you don’t have a mindset that accommodates unforeseen circumstances and downtimes, you can’t be happy.

Only one mistake that occurs will make you doubt your overall abilities and guilt will set in.

Next on the list is;

YOU’RE A PERFECTIONIST

Life has been constructed in a way that doesn’t allow things to always go as planned, so when you always expect things to work the way you planned them, you’ll definitely hit some setbacks that will make you unhappy.

The goal is progression, not perfection but not everyone understands it.

So while the few that appreciate the uncertain nature of life hit setbacks and bounce back as if nothing happened, perfectionists continue to wallow in unhappiness and frustration at every corner that doesn’t follow their preset course.


Last but not least on today’s list is;

YOU HAVE UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS

Naturally, everyone feels down when their expectations are not met so why do you want to amplify your bad feelings with unrealistic expectations?

Idealism is good as it helps keep the brain sane during turbulent times but when this idealism is heightened, it becomes a problem that brings other problems along with it.

One of which is unhappiness.

As long as you keep setting goals that cannot be reached and having expectations that can’t be met, you’ll continue to remain unhappy with every disappointment till you learn.

Happiness is free and abundant for anyone who wishes to experience it.

So if you want to be a happy person, see to it that none of these five traits listed in this article is found in you.

What other traits of unhappiness have you discovered among humans?
Share them in the comments section, and let’s discuss them.

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